Lizzie is a very passionate child. Passionate, strong willed, spirited – whichever word you prefer, she is basically a “I live life my way and do it full throttle” type of girl. Some days I just want to snap at her and dole out punishments so she will give me a break and just do what I say!
Anyone been there?
I know her. I know how she needs to continually be built up and loved, how she desires to be independent and have a voice in the decision-making process. When I step back and breath, and think clearly, I can see exactly what works with her and what does not.
Problem solving works
She is actually very talented and able to think of creative solutions to problems. I just need to plan my day so there is time for her to think it through. When I am rushed, I just want things done my way and now. Her way is not rebellious, it is just her having a say and using her mind. And she is pretty good at it.
Achieving goals works
She is a very driven girl. When she knows what the goal is, she works hard for it. When she wanted that princess digital camera, you should have seen all the chores she accomplished – and with a smile too! I can take this into other areas of our life and reward her for other goals – like staying on schedule, personal hygiene, and being kind – just to name a few.
Being excited and having fun works
When we clean, we turn on the music and dance! So much more is accomplished in much less time when we do it with a smile and a game than when we are doing it just to obey orders. Of course I am the same way in my life! How many times do I put off the laundry or the dishes because I just don’t want to do those chores? Teaching Lizzie how to enjoy daily chores is a life skill that will help her for years to come.
The biggest thing all of these have in common – keeping it positive! When I am stressed and exhausted, she feels it. She reacts. There is a time and a place for consequences, but every day life she responds much better to goals met and creative ideas.
What about your children? Does this sound anything like your kids? How do you teach them positively? Sometimes I just need help with positive parenting.
Disclosure: I am entering to be the next Kid Pointz blogger. This post was compensated as my entrance to their contest. All opinions are my own.