Smile Anyway! Overcoming and Healing from Bell’s Palsey

My favorite feature has always been my smile. Even though I acted like I hated having my picture taken I would smile HUGE for the camera every time. But healing from Bell’s Pasley has hurt my self-image and changed how I look.

15 Years After The Diagnosis – Update

I originally wrote this post in 2009. It was one year after I received the diagnosis of Bell’s Pasley. It has been 15 years since I suffered with the paralysis and today, I still have lingering effects.

Before I share what it is like today – 15 years later – let’s go back to how it felt when I first got Bell’s Pasley.

What Bell’s Palsey Feels Like

The year is 2009. It is one year after I was diagnosed with Bell’s Palsey. This is what I wrote.

This month marks one of the longest and hardest years my smile has had to endure. Last year, at the end of July I found out I was pregnant and ran out the door smiling as big as I could. Then, a cold sore erupted on my face in the end of August and I started to loose my ability to smile. I was diagnosed with Bell’s Palsy and given strict orders to rest and take care of my non- shutting left eye. They couldn’t do anything else because I was pregnant. I didn’t smile much during that first trimester.

The photo above was taken one month after I was diagnosed. I was smiling as big as I could – and only half of my face would move.

I didn’t fall into depression, though, because my child kept me laughing. We made taping our eyes shut part of our nightly routine. I would reach for the medical tape, and my child would point to their eye, giggling. I’d take a small piece and put it on their cheek, and then point to my eye and say “mama eye!” It warmed my heart to know that I wasn’t the ugly, scary beast I imagined – my 15-month-old wasn’t frightened of me!

What Healing Felt Like

Slowly, the healing came. At first, the noises weren’t ear-piercingly loud on my left side. Then, I started being able to taste food on my tongue. The final evidence of healing was when I was able to whistle after my son was born!

Lasting Effects of Bell’s Pasley

Now, 15 years later, I still have a lopsided smile. It’s more noticeable when I am tired or stressed. Basically, when the muscles on my face are the weakest, they show the bell’s palsey more.

Just the other day I was at the doctor’s for an unrelated issue. I was exhausted and not feeling well. He took one look at me and said, “I see you’ve had Bell’s Palsey before.”

So, it’s still there. I’ve learned how to smile so that it’s less noticeable in photos. I actually do have a good side and a bad side!

In fact, if it wasn’t for filters that depend on facial symmetry to work, you might not even be able to tell that I had Bell’s Palsey.

What Is Bell’s Palsey?

Bell’s Palsy is a condition that happens when the 7th cranial nerves in the face swell (they are the nerves that affect the eye, mouth, cheek and ear). When the nerves swell against the bone they can’t work. So, signals from the brain don’t get back and forth, and the face becomes paralyzed.

What Causes Bell’s Palsey

They still don’t know exactly what causes Bell’s Palsey, but pregnancy and viruses like herpes (my cold sore) are thought to be likely.

How Long Does Bell’s Palsey Last?

Symptoms usually improve within a month or a year. It took about 9 months (my entire pregnancy) for the symptoms to clear up. And even then, I have always had a droopy or “wonky” eye and smile.

What Is Synkenisis?

It is when new nerve twigs regrow and affect areas they wouldn’t normally stimulate. Here’s a video that shows what it is and what it looks like.

In my case, when I close my eyes the left corner of my mouth twitches and when I (try to) whistle my left eye closes. (In fact, I still can’t whistle unless I use my finger to cover the left corner of my mouth. And the left side is the side that was paralyzed 15 years ago).

Treatment

Is there a way to treat and fix synkinesis? Yes, there is. According to Stanford Medicine, you can try retraining the nerves. Or, get botox injections every three months. And there is also the option of surgery.

Do you have Bell’s Palsey?

If you have bell’s palsey, or you suffered with it in the past and still have the effects, please let me know in the comments. I’ve learned to embrace my new smile, but I know that option isn’t right for everyone. Seeing a different face in the mirror or taking a million selfies to get the correct angle is a pain. I get it!