Time for some therapeutic writing. It has been a pretty draining week.
There are emotional lows I hit when I do not take care of myself. Logically, I know this. When my friends overdo it, I’m all over pointing out how a mom can’t care for her family if she isn’t caring for herself first. My head knows it, but I still fall into the rut of running myself into the ground. I look at my calendar, I look at my children, I say, “I got this! I can do all of this! It will take some careful planning and stuff, but bring it on!”
Then, like clockwork, I burn out.
Every. Time.
Exhausting and empty Annie begins to do all those things she is able to control herself from doing when she is mentally refreshed – comparing herself to others, controlling her family, snapping on a short fuse from things that are otherwise a minor problem.
I know that when I eat right and take time to get enough sleep and stay physically active, and take care of me, I am a (more) patient, energetic and happy person. I know my limits and I have some of the most supportive friends and family around.
I almost feel like I am somehow abusing my blessings. Here I am, so very and utterly blessed and yet I cannot use my wisdom to set healthy boundaries and stick to them. You know that song on the musical Oklahoma by (aptly named) Ado Annie? “I’m just a girl that cain’t say no…” Yup. Hi, Annie. Me too.
I know I should. I think I can do it. Then I can’t.
I did this all the time in college – working 4 jobs with full time classes. I don’t have immaturity to blame anymore!
When I am overworked and stretched too thin, I am distracted where I am at. I love the quote above, it is such an amazing reminder. If I cannot be all there when I am with my children because I have work to do, then I need better boundaries. If I am not all there when I am at my computer and the children are with daddy – instead I am falling asleep or desiring a break so badly I zone out on Facebook – I need to change things.
I don’t believe I will ever find the magic balance. I do understand this is a struggle I will have my entire life. I can never just be. But I can certainly use my time wiser and schedule time for rest, time for prayer, time for exercise and time for healthy eating. I can focus on my health so my body functions best around my family and I can be ALL THERE.
{HUG}
I feel this way a lot. I get so tired and stressed out. I’m so like you in that I would tell a mom a hundred times to take care of herself but I never do it for myself. This pregnancy is forcing me to slow down. I hate it, but I’m trying to cherish it.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the business of day-to-day life & it can be hard to just take in the small things and appreciate what we have
i get it, but i also see the results of it too. my sister is the person you described, doing WAY too much all the time and stressed out about it. she ended up giving herself some medical problems that will be with her the rest of her life because of it.
hindsight is so worthless…of course all she was doing didn’t need to be done by her or done perfectly all the time and she knows that now, but it would have made a world of difference if she’d known it then and i try to remember that when i try to do it all….to take time to smell the roses.
Thank you for sharing that Kath! I also have a good friend that did too much and it too gave her serious medical problems. Boundaries are SO HARD for me to set, but they are so vital.
a good friend of mine told me something that i remind myself of all the time and maybe it will help you set your boundaries too. he said, ‘we should set our priorities by what we value most’. i know it seems obvious, but if we aren’t careful so many little things can get in the way…. maybe that can help you say ‘no’ to things that are getting in the way of what you value most. good luck
Life stretches us in all different directions, its good to stop and take a deep breath
Sometimes I feel the same way but have to stand back and reset and get back to life.
I don’t have nearly as much on my plate as you do! I’ve still had a rough few weeks getting ready for back-to-school. I have one in high school (9th grade), one in Middle school (7th), and one in elementary (4th) this year. Three different schools this year. Your last 2 sentences really describe what I need to do.
three different schools? WOW! And I bet they are all in activities/sports too, right? How can you say you don’t have as much on your plate? LOL! Sorry, but you sound just as busy as me 🙂 Good luck on this year Susan. I will take time for myself if you take time for yourself! No burnouts this year!